your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
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