i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Your cock deserves a montage
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
