We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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