Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize