Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
