I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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