If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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