is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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