Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
What are you doing tomorrow?
Dude its my bday. Im drinking from sunup til face down. Rinse and repeat.
Randomize
