I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Also—I just realized that your wedding gift is still on my dining room table. So...as awful as I am for not yet sending it (and I still need your address), at least I didn’t bring my screaming children to potentially the most important day of your life?
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