worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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