she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
I just found puke in my bra..
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Randomize