If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
