Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
