there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
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