drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Randomize
