How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
