Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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