My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize