fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize