A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize