Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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