i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
We have started to decorate penises.
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You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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