i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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