Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
