ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
