I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
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