Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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