Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
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