I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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