I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
