can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Randomize
