Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
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