i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
you made out with another girl for some wings
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
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