doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
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