Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
not ubering you a puppy
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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