I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
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