You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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