I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
