I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
