Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Randomize
