i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
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