Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
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