You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
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