maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
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