I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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