so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
You're a waste of cheezeits
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Oh god it's open bar.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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