No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Randomize
