Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
