Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
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