yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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