If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Randomize